listen...

Listen
To the song here in my heart
A melody I start but can't complete
Listen
To the sound from deep within
It's only beginning to find release

Oh the time has come
For my dreams to be heard
They will not be pushed aside and turned
Into your own all 'cause you won't listen

Listen
I am alone at a crossroads
I'm not at home in my own home
And I've tried and tried to say what's on my mind
You should have known
Oh now I'm done believing you
You don't know what I'm feeling
I'm more than what you made of me
I followed the voice you gave to me
But now I've got to find my own

You should have listened

There is someone here inside
Someone I thought had died so long ago

Oh I'm screaming out
For my dreams to be heard
They will not be pushed aside or worked
into your own all 'cause you won't listen

I don't know where I belong
But I'll be moving on
If you don't
If you won't

Listen
To the song here in my heart
A melody I start but I will complete
Oh now I'm done believing you
You don't know what I'm feeling
I'm more than what you made of me
I followed the voice you think you gave to me
But now I've got to find my own
My own...

by Beyonce.



When the larger you get, the less visible you become. Its this irony that is starting to raise doubts in something new that i was planning to pursue currently in life. If this was a chapter in the biography of my life, Im hesitant to continue writing further and allowing it to end paper thin. I just feel that i cannot afford caring soo much for an entity that does not know how to acknowledge or recognize the efforts that i put in to benefit the quality of life of that entity. I understand the term of "Sincerity", however, with the absence of even a minor showcase of gratitudes of even the simplicity of a "thank you" or "i appreciate it". Instead, those "thank you(s)" came very selectively to others who came to you at a mere convinience. Convinience that came at a coincidence. Im sorry, coincidences do not deserve a "thank you" or "you made my day(s)" for the reason that the effort made to carry out such acts are paper thin none as compared to the effort made to carry out with a plan or intention in mind.



Again, for the "donkeyth" time, i am not sure why "Madame Gabrielle-Suzanne Barbot de Villeneuve"
wrote the biggest controversial text which i swear to be larger than life compared to The Davinci Code, The Lotus Sutra or even the Bible.... "Beauty and the beast". If the book was mentioned in a religious text, it would be closely compared to either a slander or satan. To go back in time and tear the book before i first read it when i was in nursery would have made me a Holy man now. For this, for once...for ever ever ever ever the first time and i hope this be the last, i regretted to have done.

Lets put it this way, its just impossible for Pikachu or ever pick up the thunderstone and turn into Raichu cuz Pikachu is cuter and is just more commercially appealing no matter how strong Raichu would be. This ladies and gentlemen, is the world's biggest slander to any beliefs which is even worst than disregarding your roots in a religion(punishable by banishment straight to hell) and this is known as "Human's selectiveness to what is visually IDEAL in society rather than the much more fairly attributable CHARACTER". Look at this this way, Models, Hunks, Jocks, Singers, Advertisements, Politics and even characters in Barney the Dinosaur Series promote the idea that society only accepts the visually appealing. To put the eyes as the main senses to judge is a disrespect to the natural senses which we were taught to utilize however not taught on how to apply effectively.

In conclusion,

- Im not visually IDEAL
- Satan and friends wrote "Beauty & the Beast"
- There is a HUGE controversy on Planned Effort & Coincidental Effort and it should be weighted accordingly.
- Ive been highly under appreciated for my efforts.

and lastly,
- I still enjoy facing the ups and downs of life because they create a balance of nature within myself.












I need to update the chapter on "Love & Relationship" and remind myself its importance and value before my emotions carry be to begin on a new chapter dedicated to "Anger, Greed and Stupidity". Hopefully it doesnt go that way.


















I still have hope in you along with the rest of Humanity.

"Disappoint me. Hurt me. Cheat me. My faith strengthens even more." Nur Hakim Azmi 3:02am 10.Sept.2008.